SportsGrinder 02.19.09

Cleveland.com reports that the Cavaliers are talking with Phoenix about acquiring Shaquille O'Neal. Rumors abound that the Cavs have offered Ben Wallace and Sasha Pavlovic to the Suns for Shaq. We love the prospect of Shaq and LeBron together down the stretch run. Unfortunately, the trade deadline just passed so now we are depressed again. Sorry King James. 2010 is your year.

Marvin Harrison is expected to be dropped by the Colts. His last two-seasons have been injury-plagued and, as a story in ESPN the Magazine last month described, Harrison has some very shady legal stuff going down.

In the Swedish city of Malmo, Sweden and Israel will play next month's first-round Davis Cup match in an empty arena because of "security concerns." Several anti-Israeli demonstrations are planned in the heavily Muslim city during the series, which will be played March 6-8 at the 4,000-seat Baltic Hall. Add this to the controversy over Israeli tennis players not being to play in Dubai, and you have some creepy stuff happening. The word "Nazi" gets thrown around a lot these days, but in this case it might be accurate.

Has anyone else been following this "Mount Rushmore of Sports" promotion on SportsCenter? Because the thing doesn't quite make sense. The first two states, New York and California, both had Jackie Robinson as one of their four greatest sports figures; which seems a lot like cheating. Then, there is Rick Riley, who has the perfect face for writing. On television, though, he's the old guy who wears a sweater vest to a nightclub and thinks he's hip because he's heard of Justin Timberlake. Ah well, at least it's not Bill Simmons making his endless references to "Teen Wolf and "Hoosiers."

The Grinder doesn't have Mount Rushmore of sports figures. We do, however, have four things in sports we totally hate. It's pretty sweeping and hits major swathes of the population, so feel free to get offended if you are on this list. Just try to remember; it's only sports.

The Yankees
What's not to hate? They win more than everyone else, so everyone else hates them. This is the natural order of things. And, my gosh, the arrogance. Could anything be more annoying? Why yes, actually. The people who live in cities like Boston and Cleveland, have never so much as visited New York City, let alone seen a Yankees' home game, but still root for New York to rebel against the home-team. It's like growing up in Green Bay but being a Bears fan. At that point, you're just being a jerk.

Red Sox Fans
By now, we know the sad story. The onetime lovable losers became insufferable with victory. And the Patriots and Celtics winning championships hasn't helped Boston fans be humble, either. There's a reason you people are called "Massholes."

Duke and all thing Duke-related
Bobby Hurley, Christian Lattener, even going back to Denny Ferry, there's no shortage of whiny Duke players to hate. Then there are Duke fans; mysteriously under the impression that they attend an Ivy League school. And what's with Cameron Indoor? What kind of basketball arena has hardwood panels and brass rails? It's looks like a TGI Friday's in there. You half-expect a waitresses with suspenders and "flair" to serve you nachos.

Philadelphia Sports Fans
Most fans around the league have never been able to root for a quarterback as good as Donovan McNabb. You guys have been trying to run him out of town since got there. You think maybe that abuse has effected his career just a bit, and not in a good way? Maybe with a little fan support, he could have brought you that Super Bowl? Nah. Never mind. Just keep telling yourselves that "tough love" works.

St Louis, MO
All of it; the Cardinals, Rams, Blues, all their fans. The whole city, basically, is undeservedly snotty. Frankly, expect for the Arch, thin-crust pizza and Chuck Berry, there's nothing to be snotty about.

Cubs fans who said last year they "should" win a World Series.
It was pretty amazing, really, how self-assured they seemed to be last season. Have they not been watching the same team we have for the last 100 years?

Tim Robbins
Sorry. He ruined "Bull Durham" for us with at the wacky right-wing conspiracy roles, like Bob Roberts and that one where he played a Klansman, like "Arlington Road." Come on, dude. Where's Nuke LaLouche? We want out Nuke back

The Dodgers and their horrible, horrible late-coming/early-leaving fans.
Except Alyssa Milano. We're not dumb.