Today is for celebrating, but that doesn't mean we can't find stuff to complain about. In fact, we don't mind complaining about the celebration itself. Here's our list of things that we find really, really annoying about the Inauguration of our 44th President.First, nothing much has changed. We hate to dismiss any event as "just symbolic," because symbols are important, but the curmudgeon in us likes to point out that Obama won't make terrorists love us, end all racism and magically create a replacement for oil. One man on the Mall interviewed on TV said the Obama presidency would mean "people around the world will finally begin to love each other." Apparently, the gentleman is under the impression that President Obama will be giving everyone on earth lots of free Ecstasy.
Another annoyance is the notion that the Inauguration is a "black holiday" or just a party for Democrats. The coming of a new president, the tradition, pageantry, and above all the smooth and peaceful transition of power, should be enough to thrill any patriot, of any political stripe. Obama's victory, with it's implicit suggestion that truly anyone can grow up to be president, is not just for black people, but whites, Asians, and Polynesian/Polish/Puerto Rican blends. The advance of racial harmony that Obama represents is one all Americans can, and should, be proud of.
Coverage of the security is annoying as well. Yes, the new president is (literally) an African-American, and some people haven't gotten over it. Of course, there are always nutjobs who want to hurt the most powerful man on earth. Yes, huge public gatherings like an Inauguration Parade have a higher threat of terrorist attack. But we have lived in a post-9/11 world long enough to know that. About 15% percent of the Inaugural news coverage seems to be about all the armed guards in Washington. It's dull. We get it. "Security," in the English language's most overused phrase, "is tight." Stop. (Along those same linguistically picky lines, if we hear one more newscaster use the words "virtual lockdown," we are going to kick someone's ass. )
Finally, we have the mystery of commemorative plates. It's easy to make fun of the tacky materialism around American politics... And so we will. Specifically, why has a décor trend, decorative plates, that's been out of style since the 1950's, come roaring back with Obama? It's weird, like he's a black Elvis. With better taste. Is there some cultural nuance we're missing here? In all our time on earth, we have never once had the urge to buy a plate we couldn't eat from.
