Despite nearly a century of prohibition, millions of Americans think marijuana is a fun, relatively harmless part of daily life. Today, in fact, knowing your way around the world of weed is just one more aspect of being a sophisticated adult -- like knowing the right wine to serve with dinner. Always here to help our readers live the high life, pun intended, Playboy.com created the definitive list of marijuana morals. These are the Ten Commandments of Cannabis. The Doobie Decalogue; the ultimate creed for weed.I. THOU SHALT SHARE THY BUD
The most basic principle of potdom. Call it good karma, a mitzvah, casting bread on the waters. Just call it "not being an asshole." Share thy stash with others, that others might share with you.
II. WHOSOEVER LOADETH, LIGHETH
Self-explanatory and maybe the oldest custom in weed world. Whoever loads the bowl, or busts out the fatty, is offered the honor of first toke.
III. THOU SHALT NOT MAKETH AN IDOL OF THY HERBS
You smoke weed. Cool. Now shut up about it. Enjoying marijuana does not mean you should stop bathing, grow dreadlocks, plaster every inch of your walls with cannabis-themed posters and name your dog Indica. It certainly does not mean you should advertise your Buddha love by covering your car with pro-pot bumper stickers. There is a time to let your freak flag fly, fellas. Driving, when you are most vulnerable to law enforcement, is not it.
IV. THOU SHALT NOT DOUBLE-DIP, NOR SHALT THOU BOGART THY NEIGHBOR'S JOINT, NOR PIPE, NOR ANY HERB THAT IS THY NEIGHBOR'S
Also self-explanatory. Hit it and quit it.
V. REMEMBER THY PARAPHERNALIA AND KEEP IT TIDY
You wouldn't drink Perrier-Jouët Cuvée Belle Epoque from a dirty coffee cup? Don't smoke hydroponic White Widow from a resin-caked bong. Oh, and don't smoke resin. Please. When you clean, you will be tempted to save those shiny black blobs, let them dry and make a poor-man's hash to use only in "emergencies." Resist this urge. Resin is the pothead's version of methadone. You don't get off, exactly. You just kill the cravings for a while. Worse, smoking resin will make you feel pathetic as you are, after all, smoking dirt. Seriously. Feel better about yourself by always throwing that stuff in the trash.
VI. THOU SHALT LIGHT FROM THE SIDE
In a room full of people, you are handed a fresh-packed, unlit bowl. The rudest thing you can do, other than arrest everyone in sight, is light from the top. The best hits from any bowl are the first, "green hits." Torching the bowl's whole surface is like being offered one hors d'œuvre and taking the whole tray. Lighting from the side, igniting as little surface as possible, you will ensure green hits for someone besides yourself.
VII. THOU SHALT FILTER THY SMOKE
Obviously, if you are trying to get high at a concert, you won't use a hookah. If you care about your health, though, use bongs or bubblers instead of pipes and joints whenever you can manage. Water, even a little, filters out loads of nasty stuff, some of which would otherwise end up in you. Consider a vaporizer, too. They cost a lot and can be a pain to use, but are infinitely easier on the lungs. Vaporizers also have the advantage of getting users deeply, ridiculously, sublimely stoned.
VIII. THOU SHALT DEAL WITH FRIENDS
Basically, don't buy drugs from people you don't like. If a dealer fills his home with guns, crystal meth, gay Nazi porn or anything else that makes you uncomfortable, get your ganja elsewhere. Just not the ghetto. Never, ever go to a ghetto to buy drugs off the street. If you can't score from a reputable dealer in a familiar neighborhood, you don't need to be smoking.
IX. THOU SHALT NOT SQUEAL
Pot is against the law, folks. If you use it, you may be arrested. If you do, the police will probably offer leniency in exchange for help busting your dealer. If you follow the Eighth Commandment, that means betraying on a friend. Assuming your bust is for simple possession and a first offense, your choice will likely come down to a year's probation and a few thousand dollars in legal fees; or ratting out a buddy. Choose the former, please, lest your soul turn black.
X. THOU SHALT NOT PINCH FROM THY ROOMMATE'S STASH
Much. You know, unless he's really being a jerk.
