The AIG thing is getting uglier by the day. Congress has joined the White House in outrage over the bonuses paid to failed executives and is now trying to get the money back through some kind of punitive tax legislation. You've got to love the sentiment. Everyone hates these jerks at AIG. But you can't go around making laws after the fact. There's a name for it; ex post facto. In the New York Times, Lawrence Cunningham, a professor at George Washington University Law School, explains how the country might get some of the bonus money back without having to break the law.
The Washington Post's Krissah Thompson has a laudatory piece about the Obama administration's "Strong Sisterhood" of black women in positions of power. The women, she writes, "have quietly entered their jobs with little attention paid to the fact that they are the largest contingent of high-ranking black women to work for a president. " Oh yeah. Super quietly. Except for a profile in the Washington Post.
The amazing thing is how a story about black women in power somehow manages to avoid mentioning Condoleezza Rice until the end of the third page. It's conspicuous. Of Valerie Jarrett, the current president's White House Senior Adviser, one interviewee said, "I'm not sure there's ever been a black woman who has enjoyed as much of the president's confidence…" You know, except for when Condi Rice was Secretary of State.
Here's an idea: maybe all the sociologists, experts, pundits and radio talk show hosts are dead wrong. Maybe we don't need more "national dialogue" on race. Maybe we have had more than enough dialogue and should all just shut the fuck up. Wouldn't it be nice if a new president could put whoever he wants in cabinet posts and no one would even mention if they are white, black, Asian, Latin or a Peruvian/Jewish mix with hints of Sweede?
That is why the Grinder is calling for a nationwide, year-long moratorium on any discussion of race. At all. That means no one can discuss racial issues of any kind, ever. None zilch zip zero. On radio, on TV, in the newspapers, whether in public or private, everyone will all just have to agree to pretend that there is no such subject as race.
Yes, there will be problems. Oprah will have to do a lot more shows on cooking. The NAACP will have to suspend operations, but it will be worth it. Just think of the incredibly positive effect the ban would have on stand-up comedy. White comedians will no longer be able to tell "white people can't dance" jokes, while Asian and Latin comedians will not be able to tell jokes about liking math and cars, respectively. Carlos Menica would have virtually no material and be forced from the airwaves, so you can already see how the benefits would accrue.
The Associated Press reports that the Humane Society of the United States is suing the pet supply chain, Petland, for allegedly selling sick puppies bred in filthy conditions. The group's investigation showed that many puppies sold by Petland in its 131 U.S. stores were bred in mills under horrific conditions or bought through brokers such as The Hunte Corp., based in Goodman, Mo.
Should these accusations prove true, it would be nice to see the breeders and buyers responsible to be punished in some novel way - like keeping them in cages for weeks without changing the newspapers.
On the subject of disgusting and horrifying freak shows, it seems like most Americans are doing our best to avoid thinking about the bizarre trial in Austria where a man is accused of imprisoning his daughter for 24 years and fathering seven children by her. It's over, mercifully. The trial phrase, anyway. Wednesday he suddenly pleaded guilty to all charges after his daughter made a surprise visit to the courtroom. Okay. Good. It's over. Now can this story please go away forever?
